Entry The Third: In Which RIUSAB Eats Itself

AND EVEN IF I WAKE UP LATE I DO THE RIUSAB THANG
THAT'S AN IMPORTANT BLOG

So Fabolous has a new album out. Has had. Long time. Hell, since June. You didn't know? Well, there are a couple reasons for that. Despite being easily as good a subject for idolatry/target for Banksy as you-know-who, the Popwarriors largely (no split infinitives from RIUSAB) have chosen to ignore From Nothin' To Somethin'. Several questions: is it because Fabolous is black (despite being on the pop end of pop-rap)? Is it because they already have Lil "Durrrty South to Art School" Wayne? Or is it because the album contains a disturbingly high level of substance, all negative reviews aside? Several relevant pieces of information: it's packed with club bangers (or at least numbers), easy on the ears (and brain), and Fabolous seems to have acquired some of Weezy's, ahem, "talent" for inanity masquerading as profoundly challenging absurdity: "and the even if i wake up late i do the breakfast thang/that's an important meal."

While we're on the subject, Miss Um-ber-rellah appears to have been annointed as the Next Paris by the critical powers-that-be, despite being, as far as we at RIUSAB can tell, black. No less a fear-and-awe-inspiring personage than k-punk has declared Rihanna "the undisputed queen of pop." Um, consider that status disputed? If you knew ten years ago that a bunch of white British rock crits would fawn all over a black r&b-turned-pop singer who sounds far more like Alanis Morisette than anyone in recent memory (including Avril), we will travel back in time just to shake your hand. Or we could do this. But as far as Rihanna goes - it's striking to see that the very vapidity of her voice and music ends up being the explicit reason for praise. Shades of Paris, indeed. Rihanna may have learned the crucial trick - even more than Fabolous, she comes off as a white imitator of the 21st century black pop-r&b sound, coupled with a few left-field Canadian flavors thrown in. We here at RIUSAB can only assume that by 2010, all pop music will sound (and look) like the Alanis Morisette cover of "My Humps." Minus the "personality" or whatever.



RIUSAB SPIN MAGAZINE FILM MOVIE CAPSULE REVIEW #1 (totally old now):

Opening = big action. Boom. Hour plus of teen dramedy...but ok cuz it's like totally 80s. Boom. The Iceman cometh. Boom. Sequel? Verdict = worth $10.

RIUSAB SPIN MAGAZINE FILM MOVIE CAPSULE REVIEW #2 (freshy fresh):

Opening = literally limping. THEN boom. Two hours of existential crisis masquerading as action film plot, interrupted by cuts every two-three seconds. Also, lots of cars die painful deaths. "Jokey" winknudge ending. Hope to RIUSAB that's the last sequel. Verdict = worth $10 for the video game version.